Jeep tour (actually Land Rover Defender) by Ryan

So as Sadie mentioned this morning, our rain forest hike was canceled due to inclement weather. As a consolation prize we went on a "jeep tour" I was super pumped because in my head I assumed we would be doing some sweet off roading and love mud. While the Land Rover was super cool and I really want one, to say we were off roading would be a stretch. It was more like a very potholey dirt road, and people were driving the same roads in a VW Golf. The high points of the trip had very little to do with driving.



Here is a picture of our awesome wheels for the Jeep Tour



Stop 1
First we stopped at a "Exhibition Garden" the quotes are because this was literally on the the side of the highway and for all intents and purposes was just your average greenhouse with tropical plants.  figured it was going to be a long day.


There wasn't much to do at the first stop...so I took a bunch of pretty pictures



Ryan has conquered the bench



Stop 2
This was significantly more awesome. We hiked into the rain forest for about 5 minutes and came to a gorgeous waterfall with several very cool pools you could swim in. Myself and several others elected to swim, Sadie declined, afraid she would freeze to death. At the encouragement of our guide I dove off some giant rock into the small pool below. No death or head trauma ensued. (once Sadie posts some pics, this will be far more interesting)



Testing the waters, and that rock





Ryan actually sat down in that waterfall.  It was freezing so I opted for the standing picture :O)

 Stop 3
While this one was much like stop 2, this time there was a rope to swing off of and jump in. WEEEEEE!!!! I jump, Sadie takes pics. Rinse repeat.


TRAZAN....



In this picture Ryan has already let go of the rope...he just looks like he's frantically trying to grab it again.


Stop 4
They make a drink here called Cachaça its a hard alcohol flavored with various fruits. This stop involved visiting a distillery of the stuff from the 1700s. It was pretty cool, but more than a few of the "antiques" were from the 1950s and 60s with lots of rust. This included a rusty car jack that was probably 20 years old at the most an a singer sewing machine that couldn't be more than 30 years old. Whatever it was cool we got some free booze and bought a couple bottles to bring home.

Stop 5
LUNCH!!!!!! This was a super cool open aired restaurant nestled in the rain forest next to a river and waterfall. They served some great Italian food  and the peasants rejoiced. The other fun part is that this stop involved the only mild off-roading all day, as we forded a stream to get there. Turns out, to leave you just cross a long wobbly foot bridge over the rive to the paved road.



These are called "7 Color Birds".  I'm sure the name is prettier in Portuguese, but that's the name we got :O)




Ryan and every other boy on the tour started trying to shake the bridge as soon as thier girlfriend/wife got on it.

 Stop 6
Working distillery. Similar to stop 4, but we got to see how this guy grinds up sugar cane with a water driven press and distills it right there. He then does whatever else those guys do to put the flavor in then ages it in a wooden barrel. Again we drank and bought more booze. You have to see the pics to really understand this, but all this literally takes place in a shed, on a crappy looking farm, with chickens and not so healthy looking dogs.



See, we told you it looked interesting, thats the brewery.




Sugar Cane



Stop 7
The last stop. Then I will stop boring you with mindless dribble. "Surfing the Rock" our guide entitles this last stop. Even if he spoke English fluently and I didn't have to say "what?" fifteen times I wouldn't know what he was talking about. So we wander into the forest again and come to a huge smooth rock with water running thinly over the top and a very small rock lined pool at the bottom. The guide then convinces me and the other young dumb skinny guy in our group to follow him to the top. Since I can´t understand a word he´s saying, i let the other kid go first. The guides send him Slip ´n Slide style down the rock and into the pool. The water and algae (I assume) makes the rock really slippery . I went a few times on my ass and once on my stomach. ( the smooth rock is not that smooth, and my genitals my not recover) Finally the guide goes down. Picture a guy barefoot water skiing down the rock. He goes flying down looking like a bad ass and almost smashes into a huge rock at the bottom. The pool at the bottom is probably 5 ft wide and lined with big rocks, at least its deep. As we were leaving we see a sign for a local ``rock surfing contest.`` God only knows how many concussions will result.



Sadie: "How did that feel honey?"
Ryan: "It felt like a cheese-grater to my balls"




This is what they were SUPPOSED to look like. 





Splash!



A poster advertising the "surf the rock" competition.  Sounds like a "quick concussion" competition to me!

 Bottom line: Fun times all around, wait for pics


That's all for today folks!


PS Weird things about Brazil:
As I will most likely not be posting too often let me share a few weird cultural differences.

-PDA (public displays of affection) Holy crap people make out with each other all over the place; crowded boats, restaurants, tables with only 2 other people at them. Gross.

-Tiny bathing suits: Sure some people can pull off a tiny string bikini, but lets be honest unless you are a super model or still in high school you probably don't have the ass for it. And don't even get me started on the guys. Speedos and boy shorts galore. I stick out like a sore thumb because my suit leaves something to the imagination

-Moth Balls in the Urinal: WTF, nothing goes withe smell of urine quite like mothball. I have to hold my breath when i pee.


That is all for now, please ignore any spelling and grammatical errors as I have been drinking while typing this. OUT