Dear Abby (age 10)

Abby girl – my sweet little peanut.  My 5.5 lb first baby, the one that made me a mom and taught me so so much.  I truly can not believe (and have not yet come to grips with the fact) that you are turning 10.  Double digits!  It feels like the simple days of childhood are coming to a close.  Like we’re on the precipice of you becoming a big kid and all (the good and bad) that comes with it.  I suppose we’ll figure it out together you and I.  You’re figuring out how to become a young lady and me figuring out how to lead you through that.  You made me a mom and now you’ll teach me how to mother through the years ahead.  I’m equally excited and nervous but one thing I know for sure is that you are one of the sweetest, most kind-hearted kids I know.  In your own way you are a leader.  Not the kind of leader that is loud and demands attention and respect.  The type of leader that requires fairness and honesty both from yourself and others.  You can’t help but tell others about the injustices that you see (I mean…some of them aren’t super important; the fact that Hazel is standing on “your” stool, for example).  But if I think of the qualities you display as a 10 year old, and how they translate into adult life, I think your desire for equality will be a trait that will serve you well.  Pair that with your kind heart and I see an advocate in the making.  Someone who is aware of others around you and how they may be affected or feeling.

You are smart as a whip, and nothing gets past you.  You love to read and love it when we include you in book clubs.  You want Grandma and Auntie and I to read the books you’re reading and to discuss them with you and it’s fun to get to connect with you in this way – to hear your thoughts.  I’m often surprised at the connections you make about the stories and the messages they are trying to deliver. 

You have a good heart, and you watch out for your sister and your friends (even though you still manage to fight a lot).  At 10 I love that you still love your Owies and they travel with you everywhere.  You’re really fun to play games with and always interested in watching the adults play games that are over your head.  You want to be included in the things us adults do and want to know what we’re talking about and what we mean.  When I snap at you for being nosey you respond “hey, I’m just a kid, that’s how I learn”.  Which, in fairness is true.  But I think if you realized that just being quiet and listening might get you more info than asking questions – that’s how us adults realize we should pipe down!

We’re on the brink of 5^th grade, you start in just a few short weeks.  For me, 5^th grade was when I moved from the elementary school to the middle school.  Our school here in Marengo is a K-8, something I was glad about when you started kindergarten and I’m even happier about now.  I know that doesn’t mean the more adult topics aren’t coming – we’re already talking about pimples and deodorant and how some girls you know are wearing bras.  Gah!  Deep breath…I think this birthday is harder for me than it is for you!  Ok ok, enough, let’s celebrate you and your birthday!  I’ll leave the water works for later *smile.  

Favorite Outfit:  “The long dress grandma got me last Easter.”

Both you and your sister really did love those long dresses.  I might have to get you each another one or two for the summertime.  You don’t wear dresses as much as Hazel does.  You’re more of a jeans and t-shirt kinda kid (like me) but you do look adorable in this dress from Grandma.

Some of my favorite t-shirts of yours are your Are We There Yet t-shirt, Make Friends Not War and your shirts that have book covers on them.  I love you in the adorable strawberry skort I got last summer for you and some of the new summer swimsuits.  You even got your first tankini this summer.  I think you might be a little shy to wear it.  I don’t buy you bikini’s I think there’s lots of time for you to be a grown up.  But I do recognize that you’re getting older and that your style will change.  You still let me buy and pick out nearly everything you wear.  You have always had less of an opinion about your clothes than your sister (who loves dresses and to put together the most random outfits).  You’re happy to let me pick and I’m happy to keep picking until you tell me I can’t anymore.

Favorite Food: Cheeseburger or Bacon

This answer made me laugh.  They are two things you’ll eat, though I’d have never guessed that bacon was a “favorite”.  LOL!  Maybe I’ll make bacon this weekend to test your answer on this one 😊

Over the last year you’ve gotten much better about trying new things and eating veggies.  Of course, you still ask for “kids’ choice” from time to time and you do whine often enough about the meals that I made, but overall, I’d say you’re getting better at trying new things.  If you and your sister weren’t so dang slow about eating, I might actually enjoy mealtimes again! 

Favorite Toy: “My Owies.”

I’m pretty sure this will be your answer until you’re too old for toys and then it might be your answer even after that.  In fact, I should probably pick a new question for you all together.  Those Owies are still very much a part of our household, and you even still take them to Brenda’s each day whenever you aren’t in school.  I’m writing this post a few weeks before your actual Birthday (they take me a lot of time) and you haven’t left for camp yet (a first for you) but I’m 93% certain that the Owies will be going along for that week away as well. 

Truly though, I love that you love them so much.  A reminder that even though you’re turning TEN this year, double digits, there is still a bit of little kid left in you.  I see that “little kid” piece get smaller and smaller each passing day though.  I am sad for what’s leaving but also excited to see what’s ahead.

Some firsts this year:

• Girl Scout Camp – Just a few weeks ago you spent a WEEK at Girl Scout sleep away camp with Kayden.  I honestly was nervous to send you.  A whole week away, without a mom to help make you feel comfortable.  But, in hindsight, I think it was more MY fears than yours and I’m glad that I listened to Ryan when he told me we should send you.  You had a great time and learned some valuable life skills.  You learned about homesickness, and about being brave.  You learned that it’s important to try new things.  You are most proud of the fact that you did a zipline and that you now know how to cook Tonka Pizza’s.  I’m about to put you in charge of one meal per week…it’s time to let you learn how to cook for others.
• Roller coaster rides -  Last summer Daddy, Erin and Grandpa took you girls to Six Flags for your first ever taste of a real theme park.  Well, that’s not quite true, we did Disney when you were 5, but Six Flags has the big coasters.  I didn’t go because, well, those rides make me sick, but it sounds like you both were very brave and you tried some of the bigger coasters.  You were adamant that you did NOT want to go upside down, but overall you guys had a great time and you were very adventurous.  Six months later we went back to Disney where you were excited to show Grandma and Pappa how brave you were.  You even went on Hagrid’s Ride a virtual reality coaster that you later said made you a little scared.  In fact, you went on that ride twice!  I’m hoping there’s another Six Flags trip in your future this year, I need to talk to Daddy about organizing that.  But, you said that you might even try an upside down coaster this time around.  We’ll see!!
• You’ve been willing to try some new foods this year.  I’m sure there are others, but some notable ones I can remember are Butter Beer and Mochi.  The Butter Beer was at Harry Potter in Universal (of course) and the Mochi was from Auntie and my obsession over creating at home Ramen.  We’ve been on a mission to prefect it and you guys are just along for the ride. 
• Hamsters – This past Christmas Daddy and I got you girls hamsters and honestly, I didn’t think I’d like them one bit, but, turns out, I love the little critters!  Who knew?!?  I mean, I spend a LOT of time running a mouse trap line nearly 12 months out of the year, so when I committed to not one, but two hammies, I was pretty sure it wasn’t the best idea. Hazel wants a bunny more than anything else in the whole wide world, so Fern and Olive seemed like the lesser of two evils.  Anyways, you girls are really good hamster moms.  You help clean their cages each week, with very little complaining, you help me cut up veggies for the dishes each night, and you both play with them nearly every single day.  We lost Fern a month or two ago (I was sadder than I’d have ever expected) so we have a new little friend, Pip – a dwarf hamster.  

Nicknames:

Pretty much the only nickname we use for you anymore is Pearly.  It’s the only one that’s stood the test of time.  I still fondly remember Peanut but I don’t find myself using it often.  If it’s not Pearly, then, like in years past, it’s some random rhyming word that I pick at the moment.  Beepbops, Zooka Zomma Little Momma (means “Hurry up” in McGrath speak) pretty much anything random that comes to mind in the moment.

Favorite Movie: Sing 2

Sing 2 was the first movie you and Hazel saw in a movie theater post COVID.  I’m sure you enjoyed it because it was a reminder of the before times, but also because Grandma and Pappa took you, AND because you’d waited SO long to see it.  Let’s face it, I’m cheap!  So, when they wanted $25 to RENT the movie for 2 days on the TV, I refused to cave.  We waited until it was released on DVD and bought the dang movie for the same price we could have rented it for.  And you got to see it in the movie theater for the first time, as a sing along none-the-less.  I don’t regret a thing!

Bears or Packers?  “Both Mommy.”

HA!  I should have known this one as well.  You’ve said “both” since you’ve realized that it’s something Daddy and I are split on.  You don’t want to pick a side and I should stop asking you to.

 

Favorite TV show: Hilde

I think it’s fair to say that since we signed up for a few of the streaming services during the past few years your shows and movie options have expanded.  Lauren suggested Hilde to me a few months back when we saw them so one day when you guys were looking for something new, I suggested it.  Personally, I don’t see the appeal, but you and Hazel enjoyed it quite a bit.  It’s a little anime for my taste, but I suppose that’s part of growing up.  You get to pick your own favorites and they don’t have to be the things I’d choose. 

Strangely, Disney Junior still holds up remarkably well in our house considering we have a 7 and 10 year old.  The Lion Guard is a tried-and-true show you guys watch over and over again, as is Bluey.  You’ve enjoyed the Barbie shows on Netflix and are always excited when there is a new Barbie series released.  

Fears:  “The dentist and losing my teeth.”

I worry that we’ve scarred you for life with the dentist.  You truly do hate it.  They have you coming every 4 months now because we can’t seem to get ahead of your plaque build-up which has you even more worked up then you were before.  I’ve figured out that it’s better to just not tell you you’re going until the moment we’re leaving because you get yourself so worked up about it.  It’s gotten to the point that I hate taking you – I think dentist appointments might be a new Daddy job. 

While the dentist is bad, losing teeth is worse!  It’s a month-long process of being nervous to bite into anything, favoring the side of your mouth that isn’t loose and overall being very dramatic.  Hazel just rips them out and moves on to waiting for the tooth fairy to deliver.  You, on the other hand, would choose to keep your baby teeth for the rest of your life if given the choice.  We are nowhere near half way through losing all your baby teeth but I’m counting down the days until that part is past us.

 

Favorite Color: Blue and Pink